Failed Screenwriter’s Notebook

The Funeral Singer (G)

Professional funeral singer-for-hire Marcie Shriver (Bette Midler), frustrated by never having made it on Broadway where she feels she belongs, is determined to display her talent wherever she can, no matter how inappropriate the situation. (And it seems her confidence isn’t misplaced, as she always has the grieving mourners, on their feet, whooping and begging for an encore.)

But when Marcie’s estranged daughter, cerebral palsy sufferer Molly Shriver (Katherine Heigl), is diagnosed with swine flu and given just days to live, her relatives gather at her bedside and Marcie must prepare for the gig of her life and face her toughest crowd yet: her family! (Family includes estranged father (Gore Vidal), estranged sister (Meryl Streep), estranged cousin (Rupert Everett), etc…)

In a surprise twist of fate, Molly makes a full recovery from the flu while Marcie suffers a massive (and fatal) stroke. So it’s Molly who must take on the role of funeral singer, to perform a nauseatingly sentimental tribute to her mother.

"..and it cuts...ng-woiiike a knife........she's out of my....ng!...ng!.."